She's perfect. I can see why you loved her, once. She's got curves in all the right places and she's got eyes that stare into your soul. Eyes that I can just see you gazing into. Sometimes I wonder what would have happened if she hadn't done that terrible thing two summers ago. Would you have even glanced twice on me, would you have even looked my with a girl like that on your arms?
I know you love me. And I love you.
But I don't want you to settle. And I don't want to be settled for.
So forgive me while I wonder.
The other day she chased me down in a dream. I tried to run but wasn't fast enough, and before I knew it she was upon me. I'm sorry she said, her breath smooth and even as I wiped sweat out of my eyes. You'll just never understand what we have. I'm sorry to take him back but he never really was yours in the first place. You understand. I tried to argue but the words stuck and before I knew it she turned to leave and I was watching her perfect form disappear. My dream self tried to reason it out, thinking of all the presents in the world I could give her to ransom you back. Panic rising my eyes snap open and I discover you beside me, your slightly parted lips and chest rising evenly.
Alone I turn over and throw my arms over myself, holding myself tight and squeezing my eyes shut. I know that I will wake in the morning with your arms around me, that you and I will kiss despite morning breath and that we will revel in our bliss of dirty t-shirts and sweatpants. But somehow before I can shut my mind off I see that perfect form again and I wonder.
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